Former FBI Kidnapping Negotiator Talks Negotiation

Chris Voss is CEO of the Black Swan Group, a former lead kidnapping negotiator for the FBI, and author of the national best-seller Never Split The Difference: Negotiating As If Your Life Depended On It.

As one of our keynote speakers at this year’s International Restoration Convention + Industry Expo, Voss will address how the strategy of high-stakes negotiation can apply to helping you solve business communication problems. We caught up with Voss to get an inside peek on what to expect during this exciting talk and how it will directly apply to helping you tackle your most complicated conversations.

C&R: What can attendees anticipate from your keynote at this year’s event?

Voss: Attendees can expect a talk that addresses how the principles of hostage negotiations apply to both business and personal interactions. When it comes to hostage negotiations—the insider secret of it is that it is like emotional intelligence on steroids.

One of the main ideas that will be communicated is that thing that most people do wrong on a consistent basis during their business negotiations is simply trying to get the other party to simply say “yes”. It is stunning when you realize simply how much anxiety that can cause leading up to and during the conversation.

More specifically, there is one tip that I think will resonate: How to get them to say yes to the conversation. And a quick hack for that is that instead of asking, “Do you have a few minutes to talk” you should instead start with “Is now a bad time?” It is insane how getting people to say gets them anxious. Get comfortable with an idea and then figuring out what to do after they say no.

What I will address is what to do instead and the approach that builds long-term, great relationships. 

C&R: As a hostage negotiator I am sure you have some very compelling stories. Are there any in particular that you think translate best when talk about business negotiations? 

Voss: A story that I like to tell is one of a father and son in Haiti. The boy was kidnapped and the father was told that the FBI would help. The son was a dual-national and the bad guys didn’t know they had an American citizen. When the father was told that the FBI was going to help he wasn’t expecting what came next: a phone call from me, from Washington, D.C. When he received that call, he said to me, “You are in D.C.; how are you going to help me?”

I use this example as an interaction point with the audience. I ask the audience, “He calls you — what would you say? How much time do I have?” The lesson is that, in reality, everyone you interact with on a daily basis is looking for help, looking for answers to the question: “How are you going to help me?”

C&R: In what ways does this lesson translate to the business environment of restoration?

Voss: It only applies when people are involved. Negotiation is how they are doing business — and the restoration industry is a people-driven business. So I believe that the lessons that will be talked through during this presentation will absolutely apply.

One key tip I would offer up now is that the perfect response in any negotiation is getting the other party to say “that’s right.” Most people think it needs to be that “you are right,” but that is not correct. And that is one of the key to long-term, productive relationships.